Children are God’s blessings, not our possessions. If you decide to have children, be extremely cautious of your role as parents so you can fulfill this immense responsibility. Below are some references from the hadith and the Quran about children.
1. Show Affection and Mercy Towards Children
The Prophet (saw) loved children. He would kiss them often, an expression of his love and mercy towards them. In the following Hadith about children,
Abu Huraira r.a. reported that al-Aqra' bin Habis saw Allah's Messenger s.a.w kissing Al-Hassan (the Prophet's grandson). He (al-Aqra') said: “I have ten children, but I have never kissed any of them”. Whereupon Allah's Messenger s.a.w. replied:
إِنَّهُ مَنْ لاَ يَرْحَمْ لاَ يُرْحَمْ
“He who does not show mercy (towards his children), no mercy would be shown to him.”
2. Treat All Your Children Equally
It is not uncommon to show preferential treatment to children. Beauty, intelligence, gender, and other factors could unknowingly make parents favour one child over the other. As Muslims, we must be extremely cautious of how we treat our children ensuring all children are treated equally so they don’t live life feeling inadequate and under confident. Children have different strengths, and each child must be made to feel an equal and important part of the family unit.
The Prophet (saw) said:
“Your children have the right of receiving equal treatment, as you have the right that they should honor you.” (Abu Dawoud).
“Do justice among your sons (kids)," and repeated it thrice.” (Muslim)
“Whoever is put to trial by having to raise daughters and he treats them generously (with benevolence) then these daughters will act as a shield for him from Hellfire.” (Al-Bukhari, Hadith-5569).
“The just will be with Allah on thrones of light ...those who are just in their rulings and are fair with their families and those of whom they are in charge.” (Muslim)
3. Be Involved in Your Children’s Lives
Taking an active interest in your children’s lives is paramount to establish a connection with them. Being a parent, is not just about financially providing for children, rather parents should be there for them emotionally and spiritually as well. For example, when the pet bird of a young child, Abu Umair, died, Prophet Muhammad (saw) went out of his way to try and console him.
عَنْ أَنَسِ بْنِ مَالِكٍ، قَالَ كَانَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم يَدْخُلُ عَلَيْنَا وَلِي أَخٌ صَغِيرٌ يُكْنَى أَبَا عُمَيْرٍ وَكَانَ لَهُ نُغَرٌ يَلْعَبُ بِهِ فَمَاتَ فَدَخَلَ عَلَيْهِ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ذَاتَ يَوْمٍ فَرَآهُ حَزِينًا فَقَالَ مَا شَأْنُهُ. قَالُوا مَاتَ نُغَرُهُ فَقَالَ يَا أَبَا عُمَيْرٍ مَا فَعَلَ النُّغَيْرُ
Anas bin Malik r.a said: "The Messenger of Allah s.a.w used to come to visit us. I had a younger brother who was called Abu ‘Umair by nickname (kunyah). He had a sparrow which he played with, but it died. So one day the Prophet s.a.w came to see him and saw him grieving. He asked: 'What is the matter with him?' The people replied: 'His sparrow has died.' He (the Prophet s.a.w) then said: 'Oh Abu ‘Umair! What has happened to the little sparrow?'"
4. Pray for your Children
Prayer is one of the most powerful ways to protect your children, so they become God fearing, kind and successful individuals.
Dua For Protection
أُعِيذُكُمَا بِكَلِمَاتِ اللَّهِ التَّامَّةِ مِنْ كُلِّ شَيْطَانٍ وَهَامَّةٍ، وَمِنْ كُلِّ عَيْنٍ لاَمَّةٍ
U'izukuma bikalimatil-lahit-tammati min kulli shaytanin wa hammah, wa min kulli 'ainin lammah.
“I seek protection for you in the Perfect Words of Allah from every devil and every beast, and from every envious blameworthy eye.”
Dua for Children’s Upbringing
رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا
Rabbana hab lana min azwajinaa wa zurriyyatina qurrata a’yunin waj-alnaa lil muttaqiina imaama.
“Our Lord! Bless us with pious spouses and offspring who will be the joy of our hearts, and make us models for the righteous.”
(Surah Al-Furqan, 25:74)
Dua for Children to be Righteous
رَبِّ أَوْزِعْنِي أَنْ أَشْكُرَ نِعْمَتَكَ الَّتِي أَنْعَمْتَ عَلَيَّ وَعَلَىٰ وَالِدَيَّ وَأَنْ أَعْمَلَ صَالِحًا تَرْضَاهُ وَأَصْلِحْ لِي فِي ذُرِّيَّتِي ۖ إِنِّي تُبْتُ إِلَيْكَ وَإِنِّي مِنَ الْمُسْلِمِين
Rabbi auzi’ni an asykura ni’matakal-lati an’amta ‘alayya wa ’alaa waalidayya wa an a’mala solihan tardhahu wa aslih lii fii zurriyyati inni tubtu ilaika wa inni minal-muslimin.
"My Lord, enable me to be grateful for Your favour which You have bestowed upon me and upon my parents and to work righteousness of which You will approve and make righteous for me my offspring. Indeed, I have repented to You, and indeed, I am of the Muslims."
(Surah Al-Ahqaf, 46:15)
Children remain the forefront of our humanitarian efforts.
Countless children around the world are denied basic rights like water, food, and shelter. Not to mention, the emotional and psychological scars they face.
At Muslim Hands, we believe every child deserves a life of dignity.
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- Orphans by providing them an education, healthcare, nutrition, and shelter.
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